I can't wait to get back home tomorrow on Friday. I don't know why but I'm homesick. I miss Bobo and the praise&worship music that's constantly blaring loudly in the house. I miss the bland-tasting dishes my mother hurriedly whips up daily. I miss just being at home with Sis and Mom and little Bro. Dad's not in this picture because he's seldom at home during the day.
I looked at some photos of an ex-colleague and got so envious that she got to enjoy life so much in comparison to me. She gets sent to Europe and the North Americas and all the photos were of her happy smiling faces with breathtaking backdrops I only normally see in postcards or in TV.
After awhile of simmering in my own envy juices, I realise I'm only living the life I chose. I had opportunities which I bypassed. I chose my path, and I'm now walking it. Why am I complaining in the first place? At the end of the day, does all this matter anymore? On where you've been, what you've seen and what you've eaten? No. It doesn't.
I'm kind of depressed with the shambles that is my Life. But sometimes God uproots you so that you may be replanted....He has to tear down in order to rebuild. I'm a pot that does not question the potter.
Thursday, March 03, 2005
Shambles
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4 comments:
Actually are you studying overseas of something. I leave my home for studies, and sometimes i felt the same as you too.
No I'm not studying but working just two hours away from my hometown. It's just that so much has happened and I feel the need to find comfort amidst family members.
Being among family and friends definitely helps alleviate feelings of despair and lonesomeness.
Before being able to migrate to Australia, I was thinking about all the wrong turns I've made in life and regretted them. I was thinking that I should've done this and I shouldn't have done that. But in the end, I believed that everything was arranged by God so that I'm here where I am now.
I remember that I tried to apply for a job to the US (I really wanted to live and work abroad) but got denied that due to lack of experience. I was thinking that if I had started to work for the industry earlier, I would've gotten that job. Raquel got the job.
Then an opening for a job in Australia opened up. I applied for it and got it. In three weeks, I was in Australia and I was the last Filipino the company that hired me ever hired from the Philippines. Meanwhile, the job to the US dispappeared after a lot of IT companies went down around year 2000.
So if had been accepted for that job in the US, I would've been stuck at home. Instead, I'm now here in Australia and very happy.
I think that everything happens for a reason and if your faith in God is strong, He will provide for you and your family.
So, just keep the faith. I hope you enjoy your homecoming. :)
Thanks Geej. I'm glad things turn out well for you. :)
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